Back in KL: Weekend of 21st June ~ 22nd June 2008.
Well my birthday was on the 9th of June. So I guess if I skipped my trip back to KL during that time would allow me to miss all the fuss and duzzle, ‘cause recently there is this in-thing now to throw surprises among my old classmates (example: Uncle at Pangkor with foam sprays and Theva at his home with flying cakes). So, coming back 2 weeks later would probably cover my butt from these surprise attacks. WROOOOOOOONG!!!!!!! I still got surprise attacked. In fact, I think I got the biggest surprise attack ever assembled so far. In fact, I think my decision to come back 2 weeks later gave them more time to plan and execute their attack. CURSES!!!!!!!!!!!!
So here’s what these oh-so-friendly people did to me: when I was on my way back to my home, with all the lights still turned off and at the exact moment I opened the house door, a rabid-crazed group of friends attacked me with almost 100 (I think) water balloons (‘high-quality’ balloons that was hard to explode, therefore more painful. Thank you so much Ah Nei Nei), drenched me in fridge-cold water and plastered me with smelly cakes all over me. It feels so ‘good’ to be so appreciated, doesn’t it?
The mortar of water balloons did the most damage, and here’s the damage report:
1.) Head – 2 direct hits at the back, 3 skimmed my head by millimeters.
2.) Body – At least 5 direct hits, and 4 did not explode.
3.) Arms – 1 exploded when I tried too hard to throw it back. Dammitttttt…..
4.) Legs – 2 directs hits to the thigh, approximately 2 did not explode.
5.) Crotch – 1 direct hit. This will not go un-avenged THEVAAAA!!!!
6.) Butt – 1 skimmed my left cheek. Sexy as it may sound, but its not. A few centimeters more and I’ll be crying…
I was super soaked and super tired from throwing back the un-exploded water balloons, and I think Uncle had to stop half way to take a break before resuming the attack!!! I guess we all are too old for this shit hahaha….Anyway, I must admit I was surprised to bits and have to say that it was a damn well-planned operation. A lot of people were part of it, and here’s the list of The Culprits (which I will hunt down one by one. No will escape my wrath. No one…):
The Devil’s List:
1.) Tian Kuan
2.) Theva
3.) Thiru
4.) Majidah and partner
5.) Paul
6.) Ah Nei Nei
7.) Vijay and partner
8.) Emma
9.) Siew Ling
10.) My parents (of all people!!! UUrrghhhh!!!)
This surprise attack was clearly not a work of an ad-hoc basis. It was meticulously planned with operational execution that will make any military general beaming with pride. The operation was in motion the moment the day began (and the planning weeks before this I bet), and here’s what happened on that fateful day, the 21st of June, 2008, in chronological order…
11:00 HRS: Woke up and had Bak Kut Teh for brunch with Siew Ling around Subang area. Noticed Siew Ling made a few anonymous SMSes and calls. I asked who it was, but she changed the subject. My suspicions were ignited….
12:00 HRS: Drove to 1U to watch ‘The Incredible Hulk’. Siew Ling walked off to voluntarily buy me coffee at ‘Starbucks’ while I was queuing for ticket. I wondered why…
14:30 HRS: After the movie then went to ‘Monsoon-id’ to have my hair cut, which took me 2 hours, most of the time waiting for the stylist.
16:30 HRS: Walking around 1U and receives call from Majidah that movie is at ‘Sunway Pyramid’ instead and movie is at 6pm.
17:00 HRS: Siew Ling suggests having something to eat. Went to ‘Sushi Zenmai’, and at that moment she gave me my birthday present (a CK watch). I was happy to bits.
17:45 HRS: Rushed to ‘Sunway Pyramid’ for the movie. Receives calls from Majidah and Ah Nei but Ah Nei didn’t’ say anything over the phone (which was very suspicious)…
18:30 HRS: Arrives at TGV cinema and proceeds to watch ‘Kung Fu Panda’ with the rest of The Culprits…
19:45 HRS: After the movie, Tian Kuan says we are going to “Crocodile Farm” for seafood (but I believed that the place closed down ages ago. My suspicions were exploding). The Culprits says they “got something to do first but will meet again later” with the exception of Tian Kuan (as it turns out, he stayed behind to monitor me. Ingenious).
20:00 HRS: Went to buy ‘JCo Donuts’ and had a cup of coffee at ‘Old Town Kopitiam’. While chit-chatting with Tian Kuan, he receives numerous calls, but I did not suspect anything because he spoke in BM, and he normally speaks BM for his office matters. Very smart move….
20:15 HRS: While walking back to the car, Siew Ling repeatedly asks me for my handphones. I had 2 handphones, I gave her 1 but the other I refused to give at first. After repeated attempts, I gave it to her eventually.
20:20 HRS: I was on the impression that I was driving to ‘Crocodile Farm’ as planned, but Siew Ling suddenly said she got stomach ache and wanted to go back to my home first. I obliged, thinking it would just be a pit-stop. When arrived at my house, Siew Ling asked me to open the door (suspicion EXPLODING like an atomic bomb. Why all these requests??!!) And yet I obliged. I inserted the key. I turned the lock. It clicked open as usual. I swung the door wide open. Pitch blackness. My vision was in darkness. Complete silence. I walked in. I noticed outlines of figures in front of me. Too late. There was a roar. And it had begun….
Around 20 minutes later the attack had died and I was soaked with water. My house porch was drenched in water and exploded balloons littered the area. Some balloons went over to the neighbors too!! It was a warzone. And I was the target…and how could I have been so careless….
It was not all about water balloons as they ordered pizzas, drinks and of course, a birthday cake. And they sang happy birthday too. WOW. I never had that experience in a LONG time. So much effort and time went into this, and I guess I must thank you all from the bottom of my heart for this. Really, it was a great night and experience that I will NEVER forget (and I will definitely NEVER forget who done this to me…my wrath has spoken).
After the party, we went to a nearby mamak stall and I just had to belanja them back for their efforts. It’s not much but at least it was something right!!!
We took pictures of course, and videos as well. Take a look at the night of the balloon fight!!!:
Weapons of Mass Destruction.
"So who dropped their fake boob?"
The battlefield. Take a look at how many ballons exploded!! Curses to Ah Nei Nei (and for the painfully 'high-quality' ballons)!!!
Relics of Battles Past...
We got debris!!! Its Iraq all over again...
Head shot for the styrofoam...rest it piece...
Collateral damage!!! A stray bomb that went to the neighbours....JPG)
"Paul to base..mission accomplished." (puffs on smoke).
Group photo!!! (The decent one).
The group is awed by emma's levitating magic trick of the pillow... 
B'day cake all round...thanks for the cake peeps!!!
Peace for the pieces of cake.
This damn uncle seems to be freakin' happy about all this...
A mutilated cake...
Either it was a twister that went through here or a giant rat that scurried past the food!!!
Awwwww, my present all wrapped up from Siew Ling...
It's my birthday present!!!! Thanks so much, love you loadssssss!!!!
And here are the videos taken by Majidah documenting the final few moments leading to the surprise attack. Cheeky monkeys all of you!!!
Pre-Ambush: A beautiful message from Emma:
Pre-Ambush: They were in my house!! IN MY HOUSE!! AARRGHHH!!
AMBUSHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
The Aftermath: Ah Nei the Auntie & Theva the Hungry
And here's a video that Majidah took that was disguised as taking a photo. Cheeky devil!!! Watch the video and see how we bummers prepare ourselves for picture taking. Notice that Ah Nei Nei was the only eager beaver, posing again and again until fedup haha....Take notice that this video is rated 'PG' as parental guidance is advised due to scenes of highly 'suggestive' manner (i.e. Theva and Tian Kuan with the slinky). Be warned to the faint of heart.....
Thank you all for the hard effort and planning!!! Very much appreciated!!!! ~~~*Bows in gratitude & glee*~~~
